Robinson Crusoe Quote

"He preferred, however, "gourmandization," was an idolater of a certain decent, commodious fish, called a turtle, and worshipped the culinary image wherever he nozed it put up."
---The Contradiction (1796)

Friday, 3 June 2011

The Missionite Abroad

Dear Reader,

Only two Months hath pass'd since I first journey'd to this Kingdom, but Experience hath already shewn that one need not look far in this Towne to find a goodly Meal.  It is hard to walk outside and turn the Corner without being offer’d the choicest Selection of Pyes, Curries and sweet Puddings.  Nor can I open my Lap Top without reading twenty new Tweets rhapsodizing upon Pop-Up Burgers, Flat Whites and Custard Doughnuts.  Yet I confess, gentle Reader, that from Time to Time I long for my native Fare, and I often wonder how my Missionite Brethren would find the peculiar Tastes of this foreign Land.

Sean, a Paragon of Missionite Taste
My former Flat-Mate, Sean, for example, loyally follows the Missionite Diet.  Doth this gentle Creature entertain an Appetite for Cheese and Plumb Puddings, Sausage Rolls and Scotch Eggs?  Nay, gentle reader!  How could he rehearse with his Band, or exercise at the Climbing Gym, with both Body and Soul fatigue'd by these odious made-dishes?  No, this delicate Palate craves but the finest of Dainties: Crackers of Spirulina season'd with Algae Flakes, the elegant pleasures of the Gogi-Berrie.  He likes neither meat, nor stews, nor salt, and had never tasted Gltutenous Ales straight.  Excellent lentils, tofu steaks, sprouts, fruit; those are his daily fare, and were it not for sustainably raised fish of which he is also is very fond, he would be a true Pythagorean.

For weeks I endeavour’d to find these Dainties in London with no Reward.  But only yesterday, Lady Fortune hath decided to smile upon this hungry Quixote.  Just up E----- Road, I stumbl’d upon a virtuous Missionite Grocer, who was so kindly as to allow me to wander inside.  

For my Readers Perusal, I hath attached a Bill of Fare for my Missionite Supper, design'd to please Sean's tender Palate:

First Course
Raw Flax Crackers

Second Course
Wasabi Wheatgrass Kale Chips 
Organic Zucchini
Taifun Organic smoked Tofu

To Drink: 
Karma Kombucha (Ginger)

Even with the 10% Off Yoga Practitioners Discount, the total came to nearly 15 pounds, a costly expense, methinks, for a rather simple Supper.  But as my Thoughts and Opinions are not intended for my own Wealth and Gain, but solely for the Benefit of the noble Publick, I obligingly spared the Expense. 

Clockwise: Raw Flax Crackers, Organic Zuchini,
Smoked Tofu Steak, Kale Chips
To Drink
And the Review:

--Karma Kombucha: How my palate had long'd for this tart and healthful Nectar!  The Taste was not excessively sweet, but cool and refreshing, although the Savours of Ginger were slightly too subtle for my Taste.

--Raw Handmade Flax Crackers: At first, these brightly crimson cover'd dainties confounded both the Eye and Tongue.  For who hath tasted a Cracker containing Beetroot, Apples and Melons?  But I found its hints of Nuts and Cinnamon mild and nice.  I confess, dear Reader, I ate them all.  

--Organic Taifun Smoked Tofu: It proclaim'd to be season'd with almonds and sesame seeds, but this added little to the overall Flavour, which was insufficiently smoked and a little too salty to my taste.  But it added a pleasant Texture nevertheless. 

--The Wasabi Wheatgrass Raw Dehydrated Kale Chips were the definite winner.  Even though they came from Camden High Street (sufficiently Local in Origin) the relish of Tahini and lemon, coupl’d with its grateful Crunch, hath tasted just like Home.  

And so I am as ever, your faithful and obliging

New Arabella,
or,
THE HUNGRY QUIXOTE


Post-script- The Zucchini, the only Item upon which the Authoress could practice her arts of Cookery, was, in case you are wondering, excellent good.